141

So last night we had grand plans. We came up with this awesome girls' night idea - take cards to the bar and play games of euchre to five. The winning pair then gets to dare the losing pair - request a song and dance enthusiastically by yourselves when it comes on, order tea at the bar and throw a fit when they don't have it, dumb things like that. Sounds like a fun night, right? Not.

As usual, girls' night deteriorated within about five minutes. How unsurprising. Granted, we did have some fun but I would have enjoyed the night so much more if we could have just hung out. I'm not sure I want to go out with these girls anymore, if nobody can stick together. I was so looking forward to our girls' night. I was also looking forward to not having to be the responsible one (cause we weren't supposed to need one). I don't go for the drinking or the guys. But they had a blast and they're definitely not going to understand why I'm so frustrated.

Listening to: Good Arms vs Bad Arms - Frightened Rabbit

132

I'm beat.

This week went by so incredibly quickly but it's not until now that I realize how exhausting it was. I'm pretty sure my 8am theo class really doesn't help - I'm not used to getting up that early anymore. Classes seem to fly by, too (except the aforementioned 8am class), which really contributes to the whole week-flies-by thing.

This Honduras application is really getting to me, though. It asks all the normal questions like name, address, history of overseas travel, qualifications, things that might affect your work or health when you're there...and then it asks the expected but still really difficult questions. "Do you have any special skill areas? Please state your level of proficiency in them:", "Why are you volunteering for this project?", and of course, "What is your commitment to Jesus Christ?". I think around 20 people expressed interested in this trip and they cap it at 12 (with possibility of exceeding that number if there's a good reason, hence the application). I don't want to say the wrong thing...but I really don't know what to say. I really want to go though. I've had this same situation so much this year that I hardly dare to hope...and yet I want it so much. So I really hope this works out. Especially since this happens to be a bit of a life goal for me, working there.

It doesn't help that I don't feel close to anyone here anymore. Or that I have no idea what the living situation is going to look like next year (not to mention school).

One plus in all this uncertainty is that I am thoroughly enjoying my exhausting classes. Theo classes are slow but I am really enjoying it in that space between about 8:10 and 9. English lit is nothing particularly special but I expected the prof to be really boring - which she is definitely not. I really like my Canadian lit prof and it looks like the material is going to be so much better than last semester. My aural skills prof is pretty good too - despite the daily testing in the class - and my harmony prof is totally crazy but also totally awesome. And of course choir is something to look forward to. Something I really learned this semester is how great all the music professors are. Melanie has this hilarious dry humour that just keeps choir so light and enjoyable, Dr Segger is always cheerful and gets everybody engaged in the class, and Dr Stolte just makes us laugh and makes the material interesting. It makes me love my music classes.

It's now almost 12, a full four hours past the time I really wanted to go to bed. So bedtime it is for me.

Snow update: still coming. supposed to snow a bunch more this week but not much. I have no idea how deep it is cause it's always blowing around. I'll put a guess at 2-3 feet.

Listening to: Sigh No More - Mumford and Sons

130

You're kind of being an ass.

I just don't know if you're worth my time, or my anxiety.

127

Yesterday I went to West Ed with Al, Heather, and Becky. It was an adventure just getting there and back in the snow but the best part about the day was getting the Wakey!Wakey! CD I've been wanting for a while. It's one of the better CD purchases I've made - fairly expensive but completely worth it. I LOVE it. I also got a shower gel at Bath and Body Works that was on sale. Also completely worth it because for the first time since arriving in Edmonton last year, I've stepped out of the shower with nice skin instead of being all dried out from the water.

In other news, church was cancelled this morning. It's nuts, how much snow there is. For example, I watched three people earlier shoveling their car out of the snow at the edge of the road. It took them probably twenty minutes. On our drive back from the mall yesterday, Al decided to turn down a side road to turn around rather than go around the block - big mistake. We got stuck three or four times and had to jump out to push and scoop snow away from the tires. At least three cars besides ours got stuck in the same area and another ten were waiting for us all to get unstuck so they could pass through. The snow was coming down quite literally all Friday night and all of Saturday. I like it when I'm feeling like a walk in the peaceful dead of night but when I really need to get myself to Walmart and Safeway I just can't get motivated to do that walk back with all the stuff I need to buy.

And now I'm about to go upstairs and play a game with the guys. Sometimes it's really nice being back here.

Listening to: Got It All Wrong - Wakey!Wakey! (he drops an f-bomb or two. just so you're warned)

125

Yesterday, when I missed my first class of the semester (the first one I was in the city for, anyway), I thought school was already kicking my ass. When I went to choir and found out that five of our important rehearsals conflict with my Spanish class, I realized school actually was kicking my ass. Then I went to Spanish and realized there's no way I can handle five courses, plus choir, and a language. So I am dropping Spanish and look, suddenly school can get its ass kicked. I've now been to at least one of every class (except theo, which I expect will be the most difficult). Aural skills will take some getting used to but it should be pretty good, harmony...we'll see, both Englishes look like they'll be good and choir is gonna be awesome. And I'm finally going to get my loan, plus dropping Spanish will get me some money back, so it's looking good academically and financially, for now.

Plus, my friends are the best dancers. I laughed my face off tonight. And it's been snowing for most of the day - I'd say we got another three or four inches at least. And at least another five expected for the rest of the weekend. Sweet.

Anyway, bedtime.

Listening to: Light Outside - Wakey!Wakey!

124

I already slept through my morning class.

120

I think the worst thing about being home for such a short time is people cancelling plans. It's not as easy as just rescheduling for next week or the week after, because by the time that rolls around I'm back in Edmonton. I've now had four people cancel on me, and it sucks that I can't spend time with them while I'm home.

I also don't like being the planner for everything. I want to hang out with my friends, but that doesn't mean that I want to be the one struggling to get everyone organized every time. And I know they want to see me while I'm home too, so it shouldn't be such a one-sided effort. It's kind of maddening when I know I'm leaving in four days.

Anyway, time to go find something better to do with my Saturday afternoon.

Listening to: Almost Everything (Wakey!Wakey!)